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Comment, General

Let’s Get Literal


– September 29, 2011; Daniel Mermelstein, Howl Staff

In honor of the upcoming provincial elections I’ve taken the liberty of explaining the local political parties, despite the fact that I’m not Canadian and am abundantly ignorant of their platforms. This is what I imagine their respective constituencies look like:

Progressive Conservatives (PC): Old man Johnson sitting at home watching the political debates, saying,

“I believe divorce is a sacred covenant between a man and a woman.”

"I can't believe the law would allow traditional families to break up like that."

Liberals: “They may take our lives. But they’ll never take OUR FREEDOM!!!!”

Lol liberals, what a bunch of hippies

Green: “Yo, I’m such a n00b at this. How do you roll a joint again?”

"I was totally going to vote, but I was too stoned to leave my apartment that day."

New Democratic Party (NDP): Doesn’t really have a constituency. More like a situation: Five dudes at an almost-empty party. Host says to the others, “I know you guys just got here, but, show of hands, who wants to take shots?”

If you ignore pretty much all the text in this cartoon, it's perfect.

NDP (Extra): Situation adjusted to accommodate for recent events: One of the guests looks out the apartment window. “Holy crap, there’s like 50 gillion people outside.  Did you invite them?”

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